Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Progress: Scale Obsession

I work out.
I can remember back to the beginning of my freshman year of high school when I was sitting on the bleachers of our gym with my friend Kelsey after having just been weighed in front of everyone.  We were both pretty mortified.  I couldn't believe I actually weighed 121 pounds. . . Man, what a fatty.
I'd kill to be "fat" like that again.
I think it was sometime around middle school when I was actually told by a classmate that I was "fat" that my obsession with the scale began.  I had to have my weight at a certain level or I was eternally doomed to the single life and moo moos.  What ridiculousness! That actually led to unhealthy eating/workout habits my junior year of high school which, thankfully, I overcame. 
Since then, I have continued to struggle with focusing on the number on the scale instead of focusing on being healthy.  It took awhile, but I am finally getting away from that bad habit.  I have been lifting weights and know that inevitably I'm going to gain weight due to more muscle mass.  My pants are starting to fit better by just a smidge (I think - or maybe that is just in my head), so why do I need to get on the scale each morning to "check in"?  Answer: I don't.  Maybe I'll weigh in once every month or so just to guage things, but I'm not going to let the number tear me down. 
I should just get rid of my personal scale and use the one at the gym.  . . . I don't think I'm quite ready for that step yet.  But progress is progress!
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